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Your True Self: Finding and Improving It

Have you found your true self?

Being true to yourself means that you behave and communicate in complete integrity with your belief, values, and, most of all, with what feels right in your heart.

When there is an alignment with your inner self (emotions, states, and desires) and outer self (behaviors, communication, and relationships), you are the best version of yourself, your true self.

woman at peace

How do we find the true version of ourselves? Let’s start by looking at why you are not being the best you can be. Then we can learn how to make the necessary changes.

Top 5 Reasons You Are Not Being Your True Self

Being your true self is not an objective that we can reach overnight. Although, there are some things that can limit us in being in alignment with our true self. Here the top 5 reasons you can connect with your true self.

You Can’t Say “No”

To be in alignment with your true self, you must learn to say “no.” Saying “no’ is probably one of the hardest things you’ll ever have to do to ensure you are in integrity with yourself.

Woman with too much work to do

Pay attention to when you say ‘yes,’ and deep down, you don’t feel like doing something. Take the courage to say ‘no.’ For example, if somebody asks you to do something for them and you don’t feel it’s aligned with your needs, just say that it’s not a good time for you. You can also say, ‘no.’

You Always Try to Please Others

Trying to please others is one of the most limiting behaviors you can have. When you please others, you completely forget your true self and allow others to dictate how you should behave, look, and even talk. This type of behavior is very destructive to the self, and it is pretty much ‘acting’ yourself.

Woman feeling overwhelmed

You Dramatize

We all have emotional triggers that tend to get us out of our true selves when we experience them. Learn to tame those emotional triggers.

Woman yelling at someone on a computer

You can do so by going within and try to identify the reason why you react so much to those situations. Explore how you can respond differently the next time you are exposed to an emotional trigger.

You Project on Others

It takes a long time to realize that the external world is a projection of what is happening internally. Since the external world is a pure reflection of us, it can give us a lot of information about ourselves when we take the time to observe and be aware.

You Use Negative Self-Talk

Self-talk is one of the most powerful forms of communication because it has the power to lift you up or bring you down in a matter of seconds. It is often impressive how we can be mean to ourselves.

A woman feeling down and negative, a sign she has not found her true self.

While most of us would never express hate or diminishing words toward our friends and families, yet, we let ourselves be our biggest bully. Be aware of your negative chatter and change it to something more positive.

5 Ways to Be Your True Self

Being your true self is, for some people, a lifetime of self-exploration. Although, if you apply these three steps, you don’t have to wait your whole life to be your true self.

Surround Yourself With Those Who See You

We are often who we hang out with. Take the time to reflect on the people you interact with on the relationships you have in your life.

Are those relationships inspiring?

Do you like the person you are around your friends and family?

It is so important to surround ourselves with people who like or love us for who we truly are. Take the time to nurture the relationships that inspire you to be the best version of yourself and learn to create healthy boundaries with the relationships that bring you down.

Good friends hanging out together

You have control over who you develop a relationship with or not. That is how you will step into your power by respecting yourself and allow healthy relationships to develop and grow.

Learn to Love Your True Self

Our surroundings are often a projection of our internal landscape. If the first secret makes you realize that you might not be nurturing great relationships, it might be an opportunity to reflect on your relationship with yourself.

Do you love your physical body, or are you constantly criticizing it?

Are you comfortable being by yourself?

Woman happily reading alone, accepting her true self

By developing a more compassionate relationship with yourself, you are slowly allowing your true self to shine. This type of change will also attract people who love you for who you are and increase your happiness in life.

Listen to Your Inner Voice

Our inner voice is probably one of the most important types of communication and, by far, the most influential. Take a moment to bring awareness to your self-talk.

Are you kind to yourself?

Are you your biggest fan or your worse critic?

By observing your self-talk, you can shift the negative communication to yourself with something more positive, more empowering.

Gratitude quote

Being your true self is not about perfection but about embracing who you are, flaws and beauty. When you shift your inner voice to be more positive, you will notice that you respect yourself more and understand yourself better. A simple way to change your inner voice is to express gratitude toward yourself daily, that will slowly help you build positive self-talk.

2 Tips to Knock Down Your Barriers and Find Your True Self

We all face barriers in our life, and sometimes we wish we had a magic wand to make them disappear. We haven’t found that magic wand yet, but here are two tips for you that might help you knock down those barriers you are facing today.

“Your beliefs don’t make you a better person. Your behavior does”. —

Shukhraj Dhillon

Tip #1: Be Self-Aware

Being self-aware simply means that you can observe yourself from a non-judgmental perspective. When you are self-aware, you can catch yourself in the present moment experiencing a specific state, reaction, or feeling.

The more you are aware of your emotions, the more you start to understand yourself. For example, you might observe that you tend to be reactive when someone provides you with a suggestion on how to do something different, or you catch yourself nervously laughing at a situation that isn’t funny.

gratitude chart

When you are aware of your emotions, you have a better idea of who you are and how you tend to react in certain situations. It is also the best way to improve yourself on certain aspects that you don’t find optimal. You become less driven by drama.

Not only will self-awareness help you remove the barriers in your life, but it will also help you with the following:

  • Experience a greater ability to recognize your emotions
  • Improve your critical thinking
  • Improve your relationships
  • Live in the present moment
  • Experience more joy and happiness

Self-awareness is the key to live a life without barriers.

Tip #2: Build your self-esteem

Self-esteem is the way we perceive or evaluate our worth and is the ultimate belief we place on ourselves. People with high self-esteem tend not to see problems as a barrier but an opportunity for growth.

On the other hand, people with low self-esteem will often stop themselves from doing something because they feel they are not capable of. They are not their true self.

Love yourself tags

You can increase your self-esteem by appreciating yourself. Have the goal of becoming your best friend. Take some time to hang out with yourself once in a while. It will help you build a level of comfort in being by yourself.

Add some self-care during those moments; it will help you increase self-respect. Compassion toward ourselves and self-love will often lead to better self-esteem and higher self-confidence. No barriers will stand in your way.

6 Reasons to Increase Your Self-Awareness

Self-awareness is the ability to recognize your emotional state and find ways to stay in balance. When you practice self-awareness, you are automatically allowing yourself to be a better version of yourself, your true self, and not let your emotions take control of you.

Being self-aware simply means that you can observe yourself from a non-judgmental perspective. When you are self-aware, you can catch yourself in the present moment experiencing a specific state, reaction, or feeling.

self awareness sign

The more you are aware of your emotions and behaviors, the more you start to understand yourself. Here are six reasons why you want to improve your self-awareness:

Helps You Align With Your True Self

The ultimate reward of being self-aware is your ability to recognize when you are not in alignment with your true self. It is the opportunity to be authentic and therefore be in integrity with yourselves.

“What we think we become, What we feel we attract. What we imagine we create.”

Self-awareness is the key to becoming the best version of yourself. Self-awareness will help you in your daily life with identifying moments when you are not yourself, where you react from a place of fear or anger. When you become aware of that, it becomes easier to realign with the best version of yourself.

Experience a Greater Ability to Recognize Your Emotions

Self-awareness means that you can observe yourself and mostly your emotions. Instead of being reactive or dramatic, you can notice and acknowledge that some situation has triggered an emotional reaction. It will help you prevent actions or words that are often said or done in the heat of emotions.

Be The Boss of Your Time and Your Life E book

Improve Your Critical Thinking

The more you practice self-awareness, the more you become positively critical of yourself. That way, you don’t behave with a fake identity or act your life.

Improve Your Relationships

Self-awareness can help improve relationships because you stop trying to please the other person and intuitively align yourself with who you truly are. Showing a side of you that is authentic and genuine.

Live in the Present Moment

Self-awareness is observing yourself in real-time and therefore encourage mindfulness.

Experience More Joy and Happiness in Your True Self

When you are self-aware, you can immediately acknowledge when you are experiencing something that doesn’t feel good or right. Within a moment, you can shift what you are doing to something more pleasing, more fun.

By observing yourself, you will become more conscious of the things you enjoy doing and what you don’t like. It will become your compass to happiness.


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